I SUPPOSE I’LL ALWAYS BE ALONE

Vocals: Michael Johnson
Piano: Jenny Conlee

Recorded in 2007/2008 In Jenny Conlee’s living room and at Reclinerland HQ in Portland, OR. Mixed and mastered by Michael Johnson and Scott Garred.

No one knows better how a musician passes time in solitude than composer and songwriter Francis Lapelli. An avid bird watcher, Lapelli is reported to have only left the house when the necessity of daily life compelled him, or when wanting to indulge in his hobby outside of New York City. Upon his death in 1917, Lapelli was never married or, indeed, had never had a serious romantic relationship, or so it seems. If we take the lyrics to “I Suppose I’ll Always Be Alone” to be autobiographical, it would seem upon first reading that this lack of romantic involvement on Lapelli’s part was not voluntary. The song describes a reluctant bachelor who has been stood up multiple times and whose romantic overtures went unanswered, leaving him resolved to be alone. Having passed from this world unnoticed, Lapelli’s body was discovered in his tiny Manhattan apartment along with a pair of binoculars and a large trunk containing some love letters, some photographs, and hundreds of songs written about the beautiful young woman who lived in the high-rise across Lapelli’s street. And here we find the reason for Lapelli’s solitude. It is worth noting that the letters in Lapelli’s trunk come from the young woman, Harriet, who was very much aware of Lapelli’s watching her from his window. In fact, according to the letters, Lapelli and Harriet were madly in love. Harriet was the only woman Lapelli ever wanted. Unfortunately, she was married and couldn’t leave her husband and children. She and Lapelli therefore carried on a secret affair of sorts through their open windows never meeting, never touching, only writing letters and observing each other through the window. Harriet let Lapelli take photos of her or simply watch her through his binoculars. The English language has Lapelli to thank for giving new meaning to the word “birdwatcher.”